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NaPoWriMo 2016

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floating downriver

denial, that is where i take my vacations a river of pretending that things are ok that these seven days are more than enough broad rolling waters emptying into an ocean waves washing me up on the driftwood beach lie to myself lying out that the sun warming me is restoring my soul, re-filling the tank practice the smile i will use when i get back they will need to see that smile in the break room waiting for the coffee to brew gathering around me evaluating my tan listening to stories, trying to bask in the glow possibly extract a sense of hope that there is some remedy to the weariness growing like a secret dying my job is to just make some stuff up about how great it was and how ready i am to dive right back in and get stuff done never admitting what i am now realizing the one thing still with me after the vacation is a river of denial running wide and filling nothing